Jewish Wedding Traditions
We may or may not do everything on this list since we're Reform, but these are the Jewish traditions associated with weddings. As we think about how we want our wedding to be, we'll update the entries below to reflect what we'll be doing. The text below is liberally borrowed from The Knot.
THE KETUBAH SIGNING
In Orthodox communities, the ketubah (Jewish marriage contract) is signed after the tish by the groom, the rabbi, and two male witnesses. In Reform and Conservative congregations, the bride may also sign the ketubah, and additional lines can be added for female witnesses, too. (Cool Ketubah Fact: Despite its testimony that the groom has "acquired" the bride, the ketubah is all about the bride's rights and her willingness to take part in the marriage. In fact, the ketubah is not considered joint property. It belongs solely to the bride and is hers to keep as proof of her rights and the groom's responsibilities to her under Jewish law.)
THE HUPPAH
The huppah, or wedding canopy, dates back to the tent-dwelling Jewish nomadic days in the desert. Historically, Jewish wedding ceremonies were held outdoors, and the huppah created an intimate, sanctified space. (Cool Huppah Fact: The canopy offers one of the best opportunities to personalize your ceremony. Since there are no formal requirements for its size, shape, or appearance, you can make your own huppah.)
CIRCLING
When the couple first enters the huppah, the bride circles the groom seven times, representing the seven wedding blessings and seven days of creation, and demonstrating that the groom is the center of her world. (Cool Circling Fact: To make the ancient ritual reciprocal, many couples opt to circle each other.)
KIDDUSHIN
The kiddushin (betrothal ceremony) takes place under the huppah. It begins with greetings, a blessing over the wine, and a sip taken by the bride and groom. Next come the rings: The groom recites an ancient Aramaic phrase as he places the wedding band on his bride's right index finger -- the finger believed to be directly connected to the heart. In a double-ring ceremony (not permitted in some Orthodox weddings) the bride also places a ring on the grooms index finger while repeating a feminine form of the Aramaic phrase, or a Biblical verse from Hosea or Song of Songs. The ketubah is then read aloud in English and Aramaic. (Cool Kiddushin Fact: If you've been fasting all day, that first sip of Manishevitz will taste better than you ever imagined.)
SHEVA B'RACHOT
The sheva b'rachot, or seven blessings, consist of praise for God, a prayer for peace in Jerusalem, and good wishes for the couple. In Sephardic weddings, before the sheva b'rachot are recited, the parents wrap the couple in a tallis, literally binding them together. (Cool Sheva B'rachot Fact: The rabbi doesn't have to say all seven blessings. You can honor special guests by asking them to read -- or even sing -- some of the blessings.)
THE BREAKING OF THE GLASS
Nothing says "Jewish wedding" more than the sound of breaking glass. But what's the point? Depending on whom you ask, the breaking of the wineglass is, among other things: a symbol of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem; a representation of the fragility of human relationships; and a reminder that marriage changes the lives of individuals forever. It's also the official signal to shout, "Mazel Tov!" and start partying. (Cool Breaking the Glass Fact: There's no law putting the man's foot to the task. If you're game, bride and groom can break the glass together with one swift kick in unison.)
THE YIHUD
In a day filled with chaos, the yihud -- or "seclusion" -- is a standout ritual that lets you focus on the days true purpose: your new partnership. Immediately after the ceremony, bride and groom retreat to a private room for 15 minutes of personal time. No in-laws, no seating arrangement charts, no videographer. Just you and your new spouse staring into each other's eyes. (Cool Yihud Fact: In days of old, bride and groom would retreat to a nearby tent for a little undercover nookie action. This isn't done much these days, but its customary for newlyweds to seize the yihud moment and feed each other a bite or two of their first meal together.)
THE MIKVAH
Traditionally, the bride visits the mikvah, a ritual bath, before the wedding to become ritually clean and pure before this new chapter in her life. Both Emily and Gary will be visiting the mikvah on July 2nd. Gary also visited the mikvah in February when he converted, as it is an integral part of that event as well.
THE UFRUF
The Jewish community gets its chance to recognize and celebrate with the couple in what is known as the ufruf. To fulfill this, the bride and groom traditionally give the drash (sermon) at temple the service before their wedding. We will be giving the drash on Friday, July 2nd at BCC.
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